How to convert a bear
A Catholic priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a rabbi all served as
chaplains to the students of Northern Michigan University in Marquette.
They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to
talk shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really
all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear. One thing
led to another and they decided to do an experiment. They'd all go out
into the woods, find a bear, preach to it and attempt to convert it.
Seven days later, they were all together again discussing their
experiences.
Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches and has
various bandages, went first. "Well," he said, "I went into the woods
to find me a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him from the
catechism.
Now that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap
me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy
Mary, Mother of God! he became as gentle a lamb. The bishop is coming out
next week to give him first communion and confirmation."
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm and
both legs in casts. In his best fire-and-brimstone style he told his
story. "WELL, brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out and
I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from GOD'S HOLY
WORD!
But that bear wanted nothing to do with ME. So I took HOLD of him and
we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN
another until we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his
hairy
soul. And just like you said, Father, he became as gentle as a lamb. We
spent the rest of the day praising Jesus."
They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He
was in a body cast and traction with IVs and monitors running in and
out of him. He was in very bad shape.
The rabbi looked up at them and said, "Looking back on it, circumcision
may not have been the best way to start."
Accueil 
Mar 28 Oct - 10:43
